Why did I choose that?

ANSWER: You did choose to lead a life filled with hardship lessons. You had several layers that you planned. The first lesson, with your arm, dealt with an understanding that your appearance and body do not define who you are. You are defined by the way you allow yourself to interact with others. This was all about truly knowing how to use your self-esteem, and not a handicap, to define yourself and your connection with others. You figured out that lesson.

Then you wanted to have a hurdle that made it more difficult to deal with other people while you silently decided what you thought about the experience. This lesson has to do with your confidence in yourself and how you evaluate your self-worth in comparison to how the world sees you.

Deafness does not cut you off from others unless you allow it to. You will have to work harder to establish a balance in your life with this handicap than you did before. This does not have to keep you away from people—you just need to adapt. You need to learn to lip read; study body language, which is very telling about a person’s thoughts and ideas; and don’t be afraid to ask others to accommodate your disability.

It is part of human nature to want to help others. It is even a larger part of human nature to hesitate to ask for assistance. Take the confidence that has served you in the past and use it to your advantage. You are actually helping people to feel better about themselves by letting them assist you. Don’t be afraid—this is all part of the lesson.

Stop hiding and begin living again. You have the ability, and once you start, you will find it easier than you thought.